


Invisible string

by millscully



Category: BlackHill - Fandom, Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, martasha - Fandom
Genre: F/F, Friends to Lovers, Martasha, Miscarriage, Pregnancy, Prophecy, Slow Burn, Soulmates, blackhill - Freeform, powers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-18
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-13 08:13:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29523447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/millscully/pseuds/millscully
Summary: A long time ago there had been a prophecy, red room knew about it, the choosen Black Widow would have a powerful child, that child would bring them down, it would be their ending, that’s why they perfomed the graduation ceremony, but they haven’t taken on account the fact that soulmates were a very real thing.
Relationships: Maria Hill & Natasha Romanov, Maria Hill/Natasha Romanov
Comments: 18
Kudos: 90





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I swear this fic wouldn't leave me alone until i wrote it, so here it is. It's complete so no one has to worry about me leaving it unfinished or something like that, i'll be posting once a week from now on.
> 
> English is not my first lenguaje so please if you see any mistakes let me know in the comments and i'll try to edit ASAP.
> 
> BlackHill is a small fandom but i am glad i'm part of it. 
> 
> Hope everyone likes this story, if so, please leave a comment and kudos, they are very much appreciated.

Maria had been present since the first moment, since they brought the black widow into the ship, because Barton had seen something on her, and because she herself had wanted to, otherwise everyonek knew that there was no way the black widow would have been captured alive. She had been present but on the shadows, that’s what Fury had instructed her to to, to assess the situation, to watch her, to keep an eye on her, and Maria had done it. She had been present for every interrogation, she had breakfast at the same time that the black widow did, she had every meal with her, behind the mirror, she slept when the black widow did and she woke up when she had nightmares too. She had been on the oher way of the mirror for every nightmare, for every scream. She had also been present for every de-programmation session, she had been present for the side effects too, shivering, feverish state, nausea, vomit, sweating, it wasn’t nice to see it and she could only imagine what the redhead felt, but she never asked to stop, not even once. 

It was late at night, almost the entire ship sleeping, the black widow had endured a hard de-programmation session that afternoon, and as always she was a shivering mess afterwards, but this time something felt different. Maria had been watching her from the moment the agents brought her back to her room/cell, they laid her down on bed and left, the brunette shook her head, she had asked over and over again for more blankets to be brought after a session, but that day someone had obviously forgotten. Maria watched as the redhead hugged herself trying to warm her body and keep the shivers under control, but apparently it wasn’t working. The brunette got closer to the mirror, she was not allowed to go in, she was suppossed to live on the shadows, she took a closer look to the redhead, she was still shivering but this time Maria saw something that she had never seen before, the redhead was crying, tears were streaming down her face. She felt something pull at her chest, so she made a decision. 

"Move" – she said to the guard who was outside the redhead’s room.

"Agent Hill you have no authority"

"I said" – she took her gun and pointed it to his face – "Move" – the guard looked her down and up, then he stepped aside.

"I brought you some blankets" – she said with a clear and firm voice, the redhead was now facing the wall and she couldn’t see her face – "I also brought water" – she added and then stopped only a couple of steps away from the bed the redhead was lying on – "Is it okay if i approach you?" – she asked.

The redhead couldn’t stop the shivering, couldn't control her body, but her brain was still working, only two persons had asked her things before doing it, Barton and Fury, she turned around slowly and eyed the young brunette who was standing in front of her, she was using SHIELD’s black uniform and was holding the blankets on her hand, a couple of second went by in silence, then she nodded.

"Okay" – Maria let out the breath she had been holding, because yes, the redhead was a small woman, but this was the black widow, she had killed more people than anyone could count and she had never been caught, she was here because she wanted to, and nothing else, she approached the bed and placed three blankets over the redhead’s body, inmediately her pale fingers clutched to them – "Do you need more?" – she thought three would be enough.

"It’ll pass" – the redhead replied clenching her teeth together – "Who are you?"

"I’m Agent Maria Hill" – the brunette said – "Who are you?" – she asked.

"I’m the black widow" – the redhead replied smirking, or she tried to.

"That’s your nickname" – the brunette said shaking her head – "I asked who are you?" – the redhead went silent for so many minutes that Maria was already turning to leave the room.

"I’m Natasha" – the redhead replied – "Natasha Romanoff" - she was trying to leave Natalia Romanova behind, that was her name and who she was now.

"Well, nice to meet you Natasha Romanoff" – the brunette said – "Do you need anything else?"

"I" – Natasha cleared her throat – "Can i have some tea?"

"Yes" – Maria didn’t even know if Natasha was allowed to drink tea – "I’ll be right back" – she left the room, apparently Fury still hadn’t heard of her action because there was no one outside to reprimand her or detained her, she went straight to the ship’s kitchen, put on a kettle and in the meanwhile looked into every cupboard for some crackers, wich would help Natasha to settled her stomach, she found some, poured the water into the go cups and walked back to the redhead’s room/cell – "Here" – Natasha looked at her surprised, she tried to sit but her body was still very much uncooperative, Maria left everything on the table and helped the redhead to sit, she made sure to cover her with the blankets and then gave the cup to the redhead, they drank on silence, Natasha ate a couple of crackers, once they were done Maria took everything back except for the blankets.

"It’s you" – Natasha said suddenly when she was already at the door – "The one who was been watching this entire time through the mirror" – the redhead had felt her somehow, for some reason that she couldn’t explain she had been sure that someone was on the other side of the mirror all this time, she had felt it in her chest too many times to forget.

"Yes" – Maria replied without hesitation – "Good night Romanoff."

Maria left the room, this time Fury had been waiting outside for her, she got reprimanded and her boss took some vacations days from her, not that she cared, but he didn’t detained, didn’t change her mission, and didn’t forbid her for going inside again either.

Months later Maria was signing NDAs along with the rest of the guards, agents and doctors who had been handling Natasha all the time. No one was allowed to speak about what they had heard, seen, or anything involving the redhead’s treatment, as a proof of trust Natasha had read the NDAs and had been present to see that everyone signed them, but also because that way they knew that if they ever spoke about what they had seen or heard they’ll have to deal with the black widow herself, and no one wanted that. Once the last NDA was signed Natasha shook Fury’s hand and left the room. 

It wasn’t until a couple of weeks later when Maria saw her again, it was early in the morning when she spotted the redhead sitting on a table in the corner of the cafetería, this time Barton wasn’t with her. Maria took her own tray, poured coffee on her cup, took some fruit and oatmeal.

"Morning" – she said taking a seat in front of the redhead without asking for permission.

"Agent Hill" – Natasha mumbled – "What are you doing?"

"You seemed alone" – Maria shrugged.

They ate in silence, the truth was that most of the agents didn’t trust Natasha, but Maria did. She had seen everything Natasha had been through to become the person she wanted to be, she didn’t know why, but she trusted the redhead, she knew she was not working as a double agent, everyone else needed to see it too.

"Why are you doing this?" – Natasha asked twenty minutes later.

"I trust you" – Maria replied simply, Natasha looked at her shocked.

"You don’t know me" – the redhead spatted.

"I think i do" – Maria replied shrugging her shoulders.

"If you are trying to gain my trust to spy on me"

"I’m not" – Maria interrupted her while sipping her coffee.

"If you are trying to gain my trust to spy on me" – she repeated – "It’s gonna end badly for you Hill, trust me on that."

"Deal" – the brunette said smiling, Natasha shook her head but Maria didn’t pull her hand back until Natasha took it.

Months later Maria finally had some free days and she decided to spend them on the ground, she went to her apartment and began to cook.

"That smells good" – a voice behind her said suddenly.

"Romanoff what the hell?!" – she screamed lowering the spoon she had been holding.

"Who are you trying to hurt with that?" – Natasha asked eyeing the spoon.

"Idiot" – Maria mumbled – "What are you doing here?" – she asked – "Does Fury know you left the ship?"

"He knows that you asked for a permission to bring me and i’m under your supervision" – the redhead replied – "You don’t look happy."

"Okay look" – Maria turned off the stove and turned around – "This is the first and last time you do something like this, it’s my job we are talking about, am i clear?"

"Yes Hill" – Natasha replied after a few minutes of silence, Maria staring down at her.

"Okay" – Maria sighed – "Now set up the table you idiot" – Natasha laughed.

They ended up having some kind of routine a year later, whenever Maria took free days she would take Natasha with her, with Fury’s permision, they had movie dates in Maria’s quarters on the ship, and on one particularly night the brunette felt something stirring in her chest when after a movie night Natasha fell asleep with her head on her shoulder, Maria smiled and didn’t dare to move for the rest of the night. More often than not they would have every meal together, sometimes joined by Barton or some other member of their teams. With time everyone learned to trust Natasha for who she was, not for who she had been, she looked somehow lighter with each passing day and Maria couldn’t help but smile with her friend’s transformation.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone, i'm so happy with the response this fic had. Here's another chapter, let me know what you guys think in the comments and don't forget to leave a kudo.

Maria had been watching along with SHIELD’s agents as Natasha closed the portal using Loki’s spike, she and everyone else in the room let go of the breath they had been holding, and for a moment everything was applauses and cheers, until she was brought back to reality, she was kinda third in command after Coulson, she jumped out of her seat and began to take inventory of the damages and agents injured.

It was late at night when she was resting her back against one of the walls, if they could be called that, outside while the helicarrier floated smoothly on the air, that she felt someone headed her direction, she reached for her arm and opened her eyes at the same time.

"Excellent job out there Agent Romanoff" – she said relaxing once she saw who was the other person outside this late at night.

"Thanks" – Natasha replies shruggin like it was nothing.

"Have you checked your head and lip on the medbay?" – she asked eyeing the redhead injuries.

"Have you?" – Romanoff asked smirking and Maria couldn’t help but let out a chuckle.

"I needed a moment" – she said after a long pause.

"And maybe something strong?" – Natasha asked, Maria opened her eyes again and actually laughed seeing the bottle the redhead was holding.

"I don’t want to know how did you get that in here" – she said, Natasha siat at her side and opened the bottle taking a long swing – "But i’m grateful you did" – she accepted the bottle and lets the alcohol burn her throat.

"I was being serious before you know, if it weren’t for you closing the portal then… well i don’t know but i don’t think will be right here in this moment, you did great."

"I closed the portal while Stark was still in there" – Romanoff said, and Hill can feel the guilt on her voice.

"I would have done the same thing if it’s worth of something, you saved millions of people, that’s what you should focus right now."

Natasha doesn’t say anything else and Maria decides to leave it at that, they take turns drinking from the bottle, and although she can hold the alcohol, the brunette is not stupid enough to try and outdrink a russian.

"What are you doing out here?" – Natasha asked suddenly, staring into her eyes – "Shouldn’t you be on meeting right now? Or interrogations?"

"Fury is handling it, dismissed me a couple of hours ago after my interrogation ended, i’ve been out here ever since."

"Yeah, but why here?" – the redhead insisted.

"I don’t know really, i just needed the fresh air, there’s someone probably knocking at my door right now, and i just need some time."

"I can leave if you want" – the redhead attemped to stand up but Maria took her wrist and stoped her.

"That’s not what i meant" – she lets go of the redhead’s wrist – "I don’t mind your company."

Natasha doesn’t know what to say, she’s been working for SHIELD almost as long as Maria has, but is not the same. She’s the black widow, the asset, the exspy, the russian, the one kids and adults have nightmares about, she works for SHIELD but has never felt like the other agents, even though Fury has done everything in his hands, she eyes Maria, whose eyes are closed once again and she’s relaxed, no one has ever been this relaxed around her, except for Clint. 

"Relax" – Maria murmurs –" Why are you out here anyway? Shouldn’t you be celebrating with Agent Barton and the rest of the Avengers?"

"I needed the fresh air too" – she says simply, because even if she tried, she’s not sure she could translate her thoughts into words – "And the alcohol" – Maria laughs.

"Yeah."

They don’t talk much the rest of the night, just taking turns to drink from the bottle and sigh, Romanoff lets herself relax, and there’s something in her chest, like she’s missing something important about the brunette sitting next to her, but she can’t pinpoint it and is to tired to try anyway. 

Hours later they are walking back to her quarters, Hill actually makes Romanoff check that no one’s waiting for her at the door, and only after Natasha gives her the all clear she steps foot into the hallway.

"Good night Agent Romanoff" – the brunette says slurring a little her words while she lets the scaner check her fingerprints.

"Good night Agent Hill" – Natasha says almost laughing, she’s not nearly as drunk as Maria, russian blood and all. 

\-------------------------------------------------------

"How’s the shoulder?" – Maria asks going into Natasha’s bedroom after knocking. 

"Hurts like a bitch" – the redhead says gritting her teeth, the doctor try to patch her up, but as soon as the transfusion was over she rushed out of the hospital bed, the sweatshirt she was wearing is covered in blood, her blood, and she’s currently trying to get it over her head, wich is proving to be quite a challenge.

"Let me" – Maria says getting closer, she takes Natasha’s right hand into hers and gives her a little squeeze, releases it and then takes the end of the shirt, lifting it slowly and getting it over Romanoff’s head – "Did you at least take some painkillers?" – she asks while inspecting to check that she hasn’t pulled off any stitches, the gauze is covered in blood. 

"It’s just a scratch" – she shruggs and averts her gaze.

"Natasha" – Maria sighs, and it’s rare that they use their first names, but Maria knows the redhead knows what is currently going trough her head – "Sit down, i’ll change the bandages and give you some clean clothes."

"You don’t have to" – the redhead tries to resist.

"I said sit, and that’s an order Agent Romanoff" – Natasha huffs but sits back.

"Yes Deputy Director Hill" – she says while giving her a military salud, and Hill wants to snap at her, she really wants to, but she doesn’t, because she understands where the redhead is coming from.

"I’m sorry" – she says while ripping the gauze and checking the damage, Natasha doesn’t look at her –" I wanted to tell you, i really did, but i couldn’t."

"I understand" – the redhead says, hissing while Maria applies alcohol to the injury with a cotton ball.

"No you don’t, and i get it, i wouldn’t either" – she says, and she’s mad too, she’s mad at Fury, she’s mad at SHIELD, she’s mad at Hydra, at the universe and at herself.

"It’s for the greater good, isn’t it?" – and Romanoff finally looks at her – "Isn’t it always?"

"I guess so" – Maria says shaking her head, she throws away the cotton ball and grabs a new one to clean the blood around the stiches that has reached Natasha’s bra – "I saw your look in there" – she says after a few minutes of working in silence and while looking for the new gauze.

"I don’t know what you mean."

"You know exactly what i mean Romanoff" – Maria says grabbing the redhead’s chin and staring straight into her eyes – "I trust you" – she cleans a drop of blood that somehow has reached the agent’s neck -" i’ll put my life in your hands without a second thought" – she says without batting an eyelashe.

"You would? "– Natasha asks, because even after all this years she’s still surprised when someone decides to trust her, and there’s that weird feeling in her chest again, that reminds her that Maria is one of the few people she actually can stand. 

"Without a second though" – Hill repeats without stuttering, Nat nods and so does Maria, like they have reached some kind of agreement – "Now, come on, i need to take that bra off."

"Damn Hill, shouldn’t you take me to dinner first?" – Romanoff asks smirking.

"Very funny" – Maria snorts, while Natasha turns around, she unhooks the bra and helps the redhead get it off, then and slowly she dresses her with a sport bra that won’t bother her so much, she is careful with Natasha’s injury, and then slowly helps her put on a black tank top.

"Thanks" – Natasha says while adjusting her left arm, and she tries but is not able to hide the grimace on her face.

"Yeah come on, painkillers are next on the list" – she passes a clean jacket over Natasha’s shoulder because it is a little bit chilly in their resistance bunker or whatever this is, and after getting the agent to swallow some painkillers they join the others on the table.

After rushing through the plans for the next day everyone heads to get a much needed night of sleep, and Hill can say that at least Romanoff tries to act normal with the others, engaging in conversation and eating, actually pushing the food around her plate, because of course Maria was paying attention. Soon enough the redhead excuses herself to her bedroom, claiming that the shoulder is bothering her a little, and no one objects to that. She and Fury are the only ones left on the table.

"I told you" – she finally snaps – "I told you we should have told her, damn it!" – she punchs the table – "I told you Nick."

"I know" – he sighs, because he’s been paying attention to the agent too – "It’s too late now."

"I stood at her side while she begged you not to die" – she wants to scream now – "I watched her guard your body in the morgue, Steve practically had to drag her out, and i stood there, and i didn’t say anything."

"I gave you an order Hill" – he says.

"Bullshit!" – she screams this time – "I told you we could trust her, you knew it, you are the one who made her who she is today, you helped with her deprogrammation, you watched her become this new amazing person, you trained her again, and she has always stood by your side, taking your orders, having your back, and all for what? You should have let me tell her."

"That’s enough Hill!" – he screams – "I made a decision and it was the wrong one, there’s nothing we can do about it now."

"It was fucking wrong one!" – she snaps again and slams the table.

"That’s enough Deputy Director Hill" – Fury stands up – "You said your mind, dismissed."

"Sir, yes Sir!" – she salutes him and marches to her own bedroom making sure to slam the door as hard as she can. 

Romanoff had been hiding in the shadows, listening to everything, she can't help the little smile that tugs at the corner of her mouth, damn who could have thought that Maria Hill had it in her to challenge her superior? The redhead watched Nick for a few more minutes, but he only stood by the table massaging his temples, Natasha shook her head, quietly and without anyone noticing this time she really went into her bedroom. 

The next day everyone is up and ready at the crack of down, Hill helps Natasha with her costume.

"Be careful there" – she says while adjusting the redhead’s wig and then injecting her with the drug that will allow her, at least for a couple of hour, to use her arm but feel no pain at all.

"You too" – Natasha says,because she really doesn’t know what else to say.  
\--------------------------------------------------------------------

"Electrocuting yourself is not taking care of yourself" – Maria says while going into the medbay to check on Natasha’s, who’s arm is now again on a cabestrillo – "Thought i should mention that."

"The greatest good" – Natasha whispers before the medication and exhaustion finally takes it’s toll on her body, she’s asleep only a few seconds later. Hill shakes her head while a smile tugs at the corner of her mouth, she settles herself into one of the chairs next to the bed, and without really wanting to she fells asleep too, her head resting at the side of Natasha’s legs.

And if Clint finds them like that a couple of hours later and maybe, maybe takes a photo, he never mentions it.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where they have a talk, sort of.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, here's another chapter, please notice that the rating of this fic is Explicit for a reason.
> 
> As always, please if you like this story don't forget to drop kudos or a comment, i love to hear everyone's opinion.

Maria is still wearing her red dress when Natasha enters the room where she’s changing.

“Hey, how are you?” – the redhead asks, she can still see some shards of glass in Maria’s hair.

“Fine, you?” – she says while trying to get a shard of glass out of her shoulder.

“Good, i wanna kill Stark but that’s not new so” – Maria chuckles – “Let me help you” – Natasha takes a sit beside Hill, she touches the brunnette’s hair sofly to get it out of the way and takes the gripper from Maria’s hand, the shard it’s a large one but Maria refused to see a doctor, she hisses when Romanoff finally get’s it out – “Sorry” – she says.

“Thank you” – Maria let’s out a sigh – “I think that one was the last one” – she says – “What are you going to do?”

“Well we are going to destroy Ultron obviously” – she says standing up and running a hand trough her hair.

“Is Banner going with you?” – Maria asks averting her eyes, it’s and odd question and she knows it, but she had seen them, had seen Natasha flirting with him by the bar, and something had stirred inside of her.

“Well he’s an Avenger, so yes” – she says trying to look into Maria’s eyes, but the brunette stands up suddenly, like she’s been burned or something – “Why?”

“Just asking” – she shrugs dissmisive, next she takes her jacket and shoes in her hands – “Good luck.”

“Maria wait” – Natasha doesn’t what she wants to say, she wants to ask Maria wha’t wrong, why can’t she look at her but at the same time she’s not sure she wants to know the answer.

“I have work, see you later.”

Maria is angry, mostly angry to herself, because she has no right, no right to be mad with Natasha, they are not in a relationship, they are just friends and it’s her fault that she has feeling for her friend, not the other way around, but at the same time she is a little mad at Natasha. She thinks she got herself into a mess, she has feeling for the redhead and is not brave enough to talk to her because it could mean losing their friendship, she should be happy for Natasha, but how can she when the thought of her with another person makes her feel like her heart is breaking? She curses herself because she’s the one who confused everything, all they late night, coffees in the morning, deep talks probably meant nothing for Natasha, while they meant everything to her, she sighs, cursing for having feelings on the first place. 

Only that later comes days later, when they’ve been trough hell and back, when Natasha had almost accepted her death, until Fury’s voice had come trough her coms, and she knew it, Maria had to be with him, in the helicarrier, Maria, the only thing in her mind when she thought that her time had finally come. And even if she had kissed Banner, she knows she did it because she was vulnerable after Wanda played with her mind and her damn memories, she just wanted to feel something, anything, and he had been right there, and she regrets it, because deep down she knows exactly who she wants. 

It’s late at night in the new Avengers facilities when she goes to Maria’s office, because she knows she’ll be working there Despite the hour, she knocks and Maria gives her permission to go in.

“Agent Romanoff” – she says – “What can i do for you?” – and there’s something in Maria’s voice, in her stiff posture and in the cold of her blue eyes, and Natasha knows, she’s no talking to Maria now, she’s in the receiving end of Deputy Director Hill’s cold shoulder, the one she had heard so many talks about but she had never experienced herself.

“Agent Romanoff?” – she asks, because of course she can’t just shut up – “What am i a rookie?” – and she’s a little ofended, this is not the way she expected this conversation to go, although being honest, she doesn’t know what she expected in the first place.

“What can i do for you? It’s late and i’m about to go to my quarters” – Maria is lying and Natasha knows it, there’s a cup of steaming coffee in her desk, the laptop is still on and there’s a lot of papers in the center of her desk, Maria never leaves her desk like that, it’s always clean and neat, but the redhead doesn’t call her out.

“I” – she swallows – “I wanted to tell you that i’ve decided to stay and teach the new recruits” – she says.

“Good for you” – Maria says looking at the screen on her phone – “Congratulations Agent Romanoff” – she says and stands up – “Now if that’s all i have a lot of work to do.”

“I thought you were about to go to bed?” – she says raising her eyebrow.

“What i do or not do with my time is not of your business” – the brunette finally snaps, she takes a deep breath trough her nose and opens the door – “Good night Agent Romanoff” – she says ending the conversation.

Natasha stays on her seat, deciding what to do, finally she stands up.

“Is something worng? “– she asks aproaching Maria, touching her forearm and softening the tone of her voice, but the brunette takes a step back holding the door open.

“Nothing’s wrong” – she says, her voice firm and the cold in her eyes never going away – “It’s late and i’m tired, and you have a job to do tomorrow, have a good rest.”

Maria closes the door leaving the redhead standing outside, Natasha is left asking herself what the hell just happened, after a few seconds she finally takes a step, and then two, and then she’s in the gym, punching a bag as hard and fast as she can.

Maria meanwhile is still in her office, massaging her temples and trying to take deep breaths, trying to fight the headache that she knows it’s coming, she surrenders when the pain moves from her head to the back of her eyes, closes her laptop, straightens up her desk, chugs the rest of the coffee, and leaves the office with the laptop under her arm and her cellphone in her hand. She takes a walk around the facilities to check that everything is in order, suddenly she sees lights on in the gym, approaching slowly she sees the redhead punching the bag like her life depends on it, she shakes her head and keeps walking. 

They avoid each other the next days, Maria usually works out around 5am before she begins work and Natasha, well, she does it almost all the time, with Clint taking care of Nathaniel she has a lot of free time, training the new recruits along with Steve only takes her half of the day, so to avoid some things, especially overthinking she works out, she shoots, runs, lifts weights, swims, spars with anyone brave enough to dare her, she has never lost, never, not even Steve had been able to beat her and they both decided to call it even after been at it for a couple of hours. 

Maria goes into the gym adjusting her earphones and watching the screen of her cellphone, she’s surprised to hear that there’s someone there already, and when she sees it she almost turns around, but it’s too late now, Natasha has heard her, she turned around and they locked eyes, Maria nods as a way of saying hello and then ignores her, pumping the music to the top and beggining to warm up her muscles.

Only a few minutes later she feels a tap on her shoulder, she turns around.

“Wanna spar?” – Natasha asks, and it’s not the first time they’ve done it, and it won’t be the last either.

Maria knows that she shouldn’t, she’s not in the right state of mind, especially when she thinks about Natasha, but her actions are faster that her brain apparently and she finds herself nodding. She leaves her earphones and cellphone near the ring and soon they are in position.

At first is all about tentative punches, testing the other, warming up, until they both get tired of it and the real fight begins. And they are punching each other, and Natasha can feel it ,there’s something different about the way Maria hits her, they spared enough times for her to notice, but she doesn’t let up, she gives as hard as she gets. 

Maria throws a right punch and nearly hits Natasha square on the face, the redhead bending in the last minute and throwing a kick into the brunette’s stomach that leaves her without air for a few seconds, Natasha walks to her intending to apologize but before she can say anything Maria’s at it again, she is punching hard and fast, soon Natasha feels her bottom lip split open and tastes blood in her mouth, and hell she doesn’t know what the hell has gotten into Hill but she won’t be punched like that again. She throws a new kick, Maria catches her leg but soon she is jumping and kicking her with her left leg and then jumping in the air to free herself, Maria’s looking at her with anger now, she moves fast and manages to hit Natasha in the eye, the redhead doens’t waste any time and soon she is kicking Hill’s legs, the brunette falls but Romanoff’s not fast enough and before she can move Maria hooks her leg with hers and she’s on the floor too. The brunette moves fast and soon she has the redhead on a choke hold, she’s pressing Natasha’s neck while the redhead struggles to free herself, and they both knows it, Natasha won’t tap out and the redhead wonders if the brunette will go as far as to make pass out.

She doesn’t have to find out.

They don’t know how, but apparently they’ve been at it for a couple of hours, because the gym is full of agents and new recruits, they are not near the ring but near enough to see everything, and there in the middle of the room is Fury.

“Enough” – he says looking at them.

Maria doesn’t let go.

“Deputy Director Hill, i said enough, that’s an order” – he repeats, and sounds angry now, he’s looking at Maria, the brunette lets go and she’s storming out of the gym before anyone can say anything, Natasha throws deadly looks to every recruit like daring them to say anything, but everyone is quiet, to afraid to speak apparently, and soon she’s out of the gym too.

Maria slams the door of her bedroom and yanks her clothes out of her body, she’s under the shower in record time and needs to take not one, but a couple of deep breaths to try and calm herself, she shouldn’t have said yes to the spar and she knows it. The brunette takes her time, letting the hot water cascade down her naked body, trying to relax her tensed muscles and she can feel the bruises she no doubt will have the next morning, finally she rinses the soap out and gets out, using a towel for her hair and another to wrap around her body she opens the door to her bedroom, only to find out that’s she’s not alone.

“You’ve got to be kidding me” – she says – “What the hell are you doing here?”

“I want you to tell me what’s going on” – the redhead says, her hair is wet and she has clean clothes on, wich means she took a shower and has been in the brunette’s bedroom for a while.

“I don’t feel like talking and you shouldn’t be here” – Maria replies while opening her wardrobe and looking for her clothes, but when she turns around the redhead is right there, their bodies almost touching and Maria can feel Natasha’s breath on her face, it smells like fresh mint. Neither says anything, and suddenly Romanoff is pushing Hill against the door, and Maria doens’t fight it, soon enough the redhead’s lips are on hers, and ther’s nothing gentle about the kiss, Natasha is deepening the kiss and their teeth clash, their tongues fighting for dominance, Maria thinks she feels a pain on her lower back but assumes it’s probably a bruise from the fight, what she doesn’t know is that Natasha is feeling exactly the same thing. Romanoff is keeping her on place with her hips while kissing her hard, Maria lowers her hands to the redhead’s ass, and is only when Natasha moans into her mouth that Maria gets her senses back, she pushes the redhead away.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” – she says out of breath.

“I…I” – Natasha stammers confused.

“You what?” – Maria asks angrily – “You done playing with Banner?

“What?” – Romanoff asks confused – “What are you taling about?”

“You heard me” – the brunette says crosing her arms in front of her chest – “Now that he’s gone you think i’ll play along with you?”

“How do you?” – she wants to ask but the brunette doesn’t let her finish.

“I’m not an idiot, i saw you flirting with him at the party before Ultron’s attack” – she says – “and then, the communications were patched the entire time, in Barton’s house and then in Ucrania.”

“It didn’t mean anything” – Natasha says, and she knows how lame it sound, but it’s the truth – “I was not in the right state of mind after Wanda’s attack, i just needed to feel something.”

“What about before then?” – Maria asks and Natasha knows she can’t answer, the brunette nods – “Exactly, now please i have work to do” – she says gesturing to the door.

“What is it to you anyway?” – Natasha’s the one angry now – “It’s not like we are together.”

“Exactly – Maria repeats – “So i don’t see why we are having this conversation, so please” – she moves to the door.

“Are you jealous?” – Natasha asks approaching Hill – “You wish it was you i kissed, right?”

“Stop it” – Hill says, she has her back against the door now and she doesn’t want to fight Natasha again. 

Natasha is kissing her again, only this time it feels different, she brushes her lips against Maria’s, like giving her the chance to move, but the brunette is frozen in place, without wanting to she closes her eyes and all she can feel is the softness of Romanoff’s lips on hers. A moment later the redhead is sucking at her bottom lip, seeking entrance and Maria grants it. The brunete moans the moment their tongues make contact, and soon after she’s pushing Natasha’s jacket out, the sweatshirts underneath follows and she’s pushing the redhead into the bed. However, she knows better than try to restrain Natasha’s hand above her head, she had done it once a while ago when they were sparing and the redhead had had a panic attack, not that she told her, but Maria had had enough of her own to recognize one. She began to kiss Natasha’s neck, nipping the sensitive skin there and then soothing it with a lick of her tongue, while the redhead’s had roamed on her back, pushing the t shirt she was wearing up and Maria complied by pausing to push it over her head, Natasha wastes no time unhooking the bra Maria is wearing, another piece of clothe that lands on the floor. Maria then takes a moment, she finishes undressing Natasha, and takes her pants and panties too, admiring the redhead’s perfect body, she knows there’s no point of return now if they do this, but she’s beyond the point of caring, and suspects that Natasha is right beside her. She begans to kiss the redhead’s body tracing a path down, she times her time kissing Natasha’s breasts, the smaller women gasping and pushing Maria’s body closer to her, Maria smirks and soon is sucking a pink nipple on her mouth, Natasha moans and writhes and Maria thinks she has never being so turned on in her entire life. Natasha’s body is almost trembling when the brunette finally decides to move down, her tongue kissing every inch of Natasha’s skin, and she wants to taste her so bad, but Maria doesn’t know if she’ll ever get another chance to do this, and she wants to see the redhead’s face when she comes, so slowly she caresses Natasha’s legs and spreads her open, Natasha’s breath is coming faster and harder now, one of her hands is on Maria’s shoulder while the other is making a fist with the sheets. The brunette brushes her thumb over her clit and Natasha whines slowly, after stroking it a few times she finally enters the redhead with two fingers, Natasha moans and all Maria wants to do is go deeper, harder, faster, but she takes her time, she pushes in and out slowly a few times, Natasha’s back is arching of the bed and Maria deeps her head to suck on her nipple again.

“Maria” – the breathy moan crushes the silence – “Harder” – she says, and the brunette obeys like the soldier she is, or used to be.

She begins to pump in and out, harder, faster and deeper, Natasha is a mess on the bed, she hooks her legs around Maria hips and even is the angle is a little rare it works, Maria can go deeper and Natasha moans louder, her hands clenched on the sheets and Maria can’t help herself, she supports her weigh with her knees, being really careful of not crushing the small body under hers, and she thread her fingers with one of Natasha’s hands, the redhead opens her dilated eyes and Maria kisses her, and there’s that strange burn back, but neither acknowldges it, too lost to feel anything but the other. Maria kisses her with all of her being, while at the same time pumping in and out, until she can feel Natasha’s walls clenching around her fingers, she begans to pump as hard as she can, her hand burning but there’s no way she’ll stop now, unless Natasha asks her to, the redhead breaks the kiss gasping and moaning at the same time, her head thrown back and Maria curls her fingers, Natasha moans louder and when Maria curls her finger at the same that she brushes her clit with her thumb the redhead comes, she comes with a silent scream, her eyes screw shut and her hands on Maria’s back and hair, Natasha could swear that stars exploded behind her eyes and that she has never come so hard, Maria keeps pumping into her, wanting her orgasm to last as long as possible, circling her clit slowly, until Natasha reaches for her hand, to sensitive at the moment. Natasha kisses her deeply a few seconds later and then she’s the one with her back on the mattress.

Maria is so turned on she knows she won’s last too long, and she’s about to say so but before she gets the chance Natasha is sucking on her nipple and she’s gasping for air while her back arches off the bed, the redhead runs her fingers along her thighs spreading her legs open at the same time she bites her nipple and then soothes it with her tongue, Maria is almost trembling now, and she wants to beg, she wants to beg Natasha to fuck her, but she doesn’t. After taking care of her other nipple Natasha begins a path down, sucking the sensitive area under Maria’s breats and the brunette is sure that it will leave a mark, but she doesn’t care, the redhead keeps goind down until she finally settles between her legs, she gasps when Natasha suddenly lifts her legs over her shoulders and then the redhead is deeping in, her tongue licking her folds and she moans, louder than she intended to, then the redhead is pushing into her with her tongue and she grabs the sheets between her fingers to avoid grasping the redhead’s hair, she’s squirming by now, can feel her clit throbbing, Natasha licks from top to bottom again and her back arches off the bed slightly, the redhead tightening her hold on her legs, Natasha runs her tongue over clit sofltly and only once but it’s enough for Maria to cave and grasp at the red locks, she tries so hard not to tug, but it’s impossible when Natasha begans roaming, finding every single spot that makes her tingle, gasp and moan louder, the redhead smirks while taking note of all of them in case she ever gets to do this again and then finally, taking mercy on Maria’s trembling body she sucks the brunette’s clit, Maria squirms hard, her breath are coming in short pants, Natasha enters her again using only her tongue because she’s determined to taste every drop of Maria’s body.

“Fuck Natasha” – she says tightening her hold on the redhead’s hair, she smirks and sucks on her clit, Maria’s back arching off the bed, the redhead has to use one of her hands to keep her on place, and then is sucking again, hard, and then harder until Maria is shaking, then she bites her clit softly but it’s enough for Maria to come, her orgasm hits her harder than she expected and a scream is leaving her throat before she can stop it, Natasha keeps licking her until she pushes her head a little, needing a moment to recover from what is probably the best orgasm she’s ever had. 

A moment later Natasha is on top of her again, kissing her, and they both moan when Maria tastes hersealf on Natasha’s tongue, soon after she is hooking her legs on Natasha’s hips and they began a slow pace, Natasha grinding into her, Maria throws her head back and the redhead wastes no time sucking the sensitive spot between her neck and shoulder, their clits are brushing together now and they are breathing hard, Natasha kisses her again and threads their fingers together, she begans to grind faster and now they both are staring into each other eyes, Maria gets lost in the green of Natasha’s eyes and the redhead can’t help but think that she’s staring straight into the ocean while watching the blue of Maria’s eyes, she grinds faster and harder until they bodies are covered with sweat, trembling with every touch and then finally they hit the right spot and come together, and there is that strange feeling of burn again, but they are too lost to think on anything else at the moment. Natasha rolls to the side after the aftershakes stop and they are still breathing hard. Neither knows what to say and Maria feels like her brain turned into pudding somehow, she has her eyes closed and doesn’t notice that Natasha is watching her with a soft smile on her face, but then she opens her eyes, the redhead quick to hide her expression, and glances to her watch.

“I’m sorry but i have to get to work” – she says after clearing her throar, she stands and begans to look for her clothes.

“Me too” – Natasha says quickly, she dresses as fast as she can while searching her mind for something to say, but she can’t come up with nothing – “See you later” – she says finally and going out of the door.

“See you” – Maria says while shaking her head and going into the bathroom to take a much needed shower.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where Maria needs to go to the doctor and someone comes back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, here we have another chapter, hope everyone's liking this story, don't forget to leave kudos or a comment below !

Commandeer Hill is sitting in her office massaging her temples and nursing her third cup of coffee, she glances at the watch and groans when she sees that it’s only eleven in the morning, this day seems to drag as slowly as a nail. She takes a deep breath and takes another one of the folders she needs to check when her thoughts drifts apart to a certain redhead.

It’s been a month since they last saw each other, a few hours later after they had had sex, they both were called to an emergency meeting and Natasha left for a mission, the later that they had talked about had never come and now Maria didn’t even know what she would say, somehow it seemed to be too late now.

She sighs and pays attention to the closer folder on her hand. Now that they are rebuilding SHIELD they have stricts protocols, even stricter than before, to let in new recruits, and she supervises every single one of them, making sure to check until the very last detail, not wanting infiltrates of HYDRA in her organization ever again. 

She keeps working, taking an Advil to tamper down the headache she knows it’s coming, until a knock on her door interrupts her.

“Hey” – Pepper comes in bringing lunch – “I know you forgot to eat, asked around in the cafetería.”

“You didn’t have to bring me lunch” – Maria stands up and hugs her – “Thank you.”

“You are welcome” – they sit again and chat a little about work, they had become sort of friends while Maria had been “working” for Stark industries, they both worked until very late at night and then be the first ones in the office, after crossing each other on the elevator in and out a couple of times they began to share breakfast, and then when it was late and they were the only ones around, a glass of scotch. Maria liked Pepper, it could be said that she even admire the woman for being able to put up with Stark’s shit.

“You look tired” – the blonde said bringing Maria back to the conversation – “Are you okay?” – there was some concern in her voice.

“I have a headache” – she said dismmisively – “It’ll pass” – she ate some salad – “So, how have you been? I haven’t seen you in a month.”

“Answering with another question Commander Hill?” – Pepper said raising an eyebrow, but she didn’t pressure Maria to talk, she never did – “I’ve been swamped with work, and for what i can see you are the same” – Maria nodded – “How’s the selection going?”

“We have thirty new recruits” – she said – “I’ll began training them next week, we’ve come up with strict protocols to make sure that HYDRA doesn’t infiltrate us again” – she can’t help but shake her head, that had been a mess that she didn’t want to repeat.

“How’s Natasha?” – Pepper asks suddenly, and Maria frowns a little at the odd question – “Okay fine, i’ll tell you the truth” – Maria waits patiently –“ I’ve heard some rumors, about you been more irritable than usual since she left.”

“Who told you that?” – she asks almost angry, damn rumours.

“I can’t tell you, i swore i would not tell you” – Pepper says – “Did something happen between you too?” – she asks softly.

Maria takes a moment to answer, she hasn’t told anyone about this and she knows it’s eating her inside, she needs to talk with someone and been able to process her feelings.

“You can not tell anyone about this” – she says finally – “I’m serious Pepper, not even Tony” – the blonde nods –“ If you do i will never trust you again.”

“I promise” – Pepper nods solemnly.

“We slept together” – she mutters and has to shush the blonde to keep quiet.

“Oh my god i knew it” – Pepper is grining from ear to ear – “And?”

“I’m not giving you details about my sex life” – she says almost laughing –“ The thing is that we didn’t get to talk, and then she left for a mission and now”

“Now what?”

“Now seems too late to do or say anything.”

“Don’t be silly, you both need to have a conversation that’s all.”

“I don’t think it’s gonna be that simple.”

“Why not? It’s not like SHIELD has a non fraternation policy.”

“It’s not that” – she massages her temples again – “We are complicated people.”

“Hill, i’m dating Tony Stark, i know what complicated looks like” – they both laugh –“ I’m serious, if you want to have a relationship then you need to talk to her, i know it’s hard for you to share your feelings”

“That’s an understament” – Maria snorts.

“But i’m sure it will be worthy at the end.”

“Thanks” – Maria whispers.

They talk for almost half an hour more until Pepper announces that she needs to go back to her own office at Stark’s.

“And don’t forget to eat lunch again, you’re looking a little pale, you need to take care of yourself.”

“I know” – Maria sighs – “I will” – they hug again and Maria walks Pepper to the door, promising to call her sometime to have a drink.

The next day Maria leaves her quarters to go to her office as usual, the headache she had been nursing since yesterday has only gotten worse and she is feeling slightly nauseous, her breasts are bothering her too and she thinks that her period is probably coming this week, she checks her calendar just in case. She ditches coffee for a hot cup of tea and asks her assistant to bring her some crackers, thinking that maybe they will help settle her stomach. Around lunch time she feels a little better, although the brunette avoids eating because she still feels a little nautious, been a Friday she leaves her office earlier and goes straight to the gym, she goes to the lockers, changes her clothes and thanks god that for her position she gets an entire hour in this place only for herself, no one is allowed to enter except those few with autorization. She is running to warm up her body when the doors open.

“Hey, mind if i train now? It’s the only time i have” – Clint says apologetic.

“Sure, no problem” – she says without stopping running around the gym, she plugs her earphones in and drowns out the outside sound.

She’s been running for about fifteen minutes when the first wave of dizziness hits her, her vision becomes blurry and a cold sweat runs through her body, she stops, placing her hand on the wall and breathing deeply trough her nose.

“Hey” – she sees Clint’s feet near her but he doesn’t touch her – “You okay?” – he asks.

“I’m” – she straightens her back ready to answer, but doesnt’s get to say she’s fine when her vision black outs and the entire world becomes dark.

\------------------------------------------------

“I don’t know, she was pale as a ghost” – she hears Clint’s voice – “maybe it was the heat?” – he says unsure – “I mange to catch her before she collapsed on the ground.”

She becomes aware of her surroundings little by little, she can hear the beeping of a monitor, and the antiseptic smell of the room, the brunette opens her eyes very slowly, so they can adapt to the bright light in the room.

“Commandeer Hill?” – a female voice asks – “Commander Hill can you hear me?” – she nods, openeing her eyes entirely now and squinting just for a moment – “How do you feel?”

“Thirsty” – she says with a raspy voice, Clint gives the doctor a cup of water with a straw and the doctor gives it to her.

“What’s the last thing you remember?” – the doctor, Danvers her tag says, asks.

“I was running” – she says, her mind is foggy and she feels like her entire body weights a thousand libras – “What happened?” – she asks, looking to Clint.

“You were running” – he confirms – “Then stopped and i guess you were feeling dizzy, you were white as a sheet of paper and then you blacked out.”

“Thanks for the catch” – she says, and Clint nods – “It’s probably low sugar or something like that” – she tries to sit and get out of bed but the doctor stops her.

“I’m sorry Commandeer Hill” – she says – “But you’ve been out for almost an hour, we’re running tests right now, and you’re not allowed to leave until i or a superior says so.”

“I’m not allowed?” – she repeats rasing her eyebrow –“ Do you know who you are talking to?”

“I’m well aware” – the doctor doesn’t back away – “And you’re my superior, but not now, now you’re my patient.”

“Fine” – she says huffing – “Make it quick then” – she orders.

The doctor leaves her room with some vial of blood that, apparently, they had taken while she was out.

“You’re still pale” – Clint says from the door – “Do you want something to eat?”

“Why are you still here?” – she asks suspicious.

“Can i just be a good friend and agent?”

“Natasha told you” – and it’s not a question, she knows it and he doesn’t denies it – “You don’t have to stay.”

“Look, i’m gonna bring you some food because that’s what a good person would do” – he says opening the door – “and like it or now you have a friend here Hill, let them take care of you.”

She groans resting her head back on the pillow when Clint leaves, the headache is back and she’s seriouly considering calling a nurse who can give her something for the pain, she masages her temple and takes a couple of deep breaths, damn migraines. About fifteen minutes later Clint is back with his hands full, it almost looks like he ravaged the entire kitchen, she chuckles and then he sits on a chair near her bed, eating with her.

“How are the kids?” – she asks, of course she knows about his family, she helped hide them from every data base and the entire world.

“They are fine” – he says while munching some pizza – “Getting older each day” – he sighs – “It’s hard not being with them every day, but this is the life we chose, and Laura knew it.”

“It’s the life we chose”– she repeats agreeing, her thoughts drift of for a few seconds when Clin’t cellphone beeps, he goes outside to take the call.

“Sorry, i have to go” – he says coming back a few minutes later – “I’ll check on you later if you’re still here.”

“Thanks Clint” – she says, the man winks at her and leaves the room. 

Apparently Maria was more tired than she thought because she wakes a couple of hours later with someone shaking her shoulder softly.

“Sorry” – she says clearing her throat.

“It’s okay Commandeer Hill” – the doctor says smiling –“ I have your results back” – she says checking the paper on her hands.

“Good, so what was it, low sugar?” – she asks.

“Well, yes” – the woman says – “I… Well i guess you don’t know so” – she clears her throat – “You’re pregnant.”

Maria’s world stops for a moment and she forgets to breath.

“What?” – she asks breathless.

“I guess you were not trying to get pregnant, but sometimes cotraception fails and”

“No, i” – she thinks for a moment – “How far am i?”

“Around four weeks” – the doctor says after looking at the papers she’s still holding.

“That’s impossible” – Maria says –“ Impossible” – repeats.

“Well, as i was saying contraception fails sometimes and you have options”

“I’ve only had sex with a woman” – she says finally – “It’s impossible, the results have to be wrong.”

“I’ve run them myself” – the doctor says – “You’ve only had sex with a woman then” – Maria nods – “Okay, this is, i’ve never though i’d get to see this” – the doctor says in awe.

“What?” – Maria asks, her brain is not working properly and the room suddenly feels small.

“What do you know about soulmates?” – the woman asks with a serious expression on her face.

“They exist” – Maria says – “But they are rare and i’ve never met a pair” – she says matter of fact.

“They are rare indeed” – the doctor says – “Not everyone has one and that doesn’t impact on their daily life” – she continues – “But there’s some literature about them, i’ve read some cases about soulmates of the same sex, women, who were able to conceive without a man.”

Natasha is her soulmate? Maria feels like she can’t breathe, the doctor places a hand on her shoulder to ground her.

“I know it’s a lot to take in” – she says apologetic – “I can bring you all the information available” – Maria nods –“ Is there something you want to ask me?”

“I need you to check that the baby is okay” – she says.

“It may be too soon to hear a heartbeat” – the doctor says.

“No it’s” – she takes a deep breath – “I had a miscarriage about a year ago.”

“Okay” – Danvers stands up – “I’ll do a scan.”

“No one can know about this” – Maria says firmly, and suddenly she is not the patient anymore, she’s Commandeer Hill now –“ I don’t know how you will manage, but you’re the only one allowed to know about this, and if someone finds out you’ll never be able to find a job again.”

“I know how to keep the confidenciality of my patients” – the doctor says without flinching, Maria likes her. 

Fifteen minutes later Maria is cleaning the gel from her stomach while the doctor is printing some pictures.

“As i say, everything looks perfect, just as it should be at four weeks, i know you may be scared considering your previous experience, but for now everything looks good” – Maria nods – “I checked your history and the pregnancy is not listed.”

“I didn’t include it” – she says.

“How far along were you when it happened?

“Fifteen weeks” – Maria says.

“Okay” – the doctor stands up and leaves the pictures on the table by Maria’s bed –“ I know you must be nervous, but i want you to know you can ask me anything, doesn’t matter what time you can call me, we’ll make check ups as often as you want” – she thinks for a moment – “If you want to continue the pregnancy that is.”

“I need some time to think” – she says – “But thanks.”

“Well here’s my card” – Danvers walks to the door – “You can put your clothes on and go now, get some rest and try to take the weekend off, i’m not gonna tell you not to exercise or anything like that because your body is uded to it and it shouldn’t harm the baby” – Maria nodded – “However, i would advice agains lifting heavy things and over exhausting yourself, you need to rest.”

“I will” – Maria nods, the doctos gaves her a little smile and then she leaves.

The brunette takes the hospital gown out and begins to dress herself, a thousand thoughts running trough her mind, she’s walking the hallway that takes her to her quarters when her cellphone beeps indicating a new message, it’s from Clint.

“Nat is back”


End file.
